When I found out I was pregnant and completing my self referral to the hospital maternity services, they ask where you would like to give birth and all my instincts told me I wanted to have a home birth.
This was my first birth and after listening to friends and family who had given birth and the media and hearing their horror stories, I knew I wanted to be in a place that I feel safe. I spoke to my partner, he was worried about a home birth at first as his priority was the safety of me and baby, but after doing lots of research and sending him lots of information he felt better. Even though his and my family questioned the decision and even told him ‘you can’t have a home birth if it’s your first baby’ but we stayed strong and persevered as we knew this was the right choice for us.
I had heard of hypnobirthing through listening to podcasts and a friend who raved about it for her second birth, and I knew we could and would have a positive birth experience. Throughout my pregnancy I really enjoyed organising our birth and getting everything together like a birth pool, essential oils and candles and was really looking forward to making it our cosy, safe and comfy space. I wanted my partner to have an active role in our birth, but I knew he was feeling apprehensive and worried about not knowing what to do. So we booked a space on Rise and Glow Hypnobirthing course with Laura and it was so valuable in teaching us what happens in birth and all the different techniques we could use and how he could support me. Once I went on maternity leave I practised all the relaxation techniques and positive affirmations daily and got into a lovely routine. I am a worrier so still had all the common worries throughout my pregnancy but the hypnobirthing was the best thing I could do to help me. I started my maternity leave a few weeks before my due date so I could get my mind and body in the best shape possible before birth, and to enjoy the last few weeks of child free life, I would highly recommend doing this if you can and spoiling yourself.
I had a pretty good pregnancy, although at my 12 week scan was told I was a high risk for preeclampsia, so took aspirin daily. By my 20 week scan my risk of preeclampsia had reduced to low risk. I also had very bad heartburn, low iron levels which I took iron tablets for and consequently was very constipated so had to take lactulose for that. Towards the end of my pregnancy I also suffered with quite bad backache but used my breathing techniques to manage the pain, I did start to panic and thought if my back pain is this intense, how will I handle labour. But I kept practising the hypnobirthing techniques I had learnt and started to look at it as ‘if I can get through my back pain I can get through childbirth’. I also had an acupuncture session for my back pain and that cured my pain after a couple of days, so I would definitely recommend.
After weeks of eating dates, drinking raspberry leaf tea, pelvic floor exercises and perineal massage our beautiful girl arrived at 40 weeks and 4 days. I was offered a membrane sweep at my 40 week midwife appointment but using the B.R.A.I.N technique I declined and knew baby would appear when we were both ready. The midwives were always very supportive and happy that I had chosen to have a home birth, although at my 40 week appointment, told me they had no midwife cover for home births over the weekend. Although I was disappointed my next choice was the Oasis Birth Centre at Princess Royal University Hospital and I was happy that if I did need to go to the birth centre I would have access to chemical pain relief if needed it and their expertise.
Sunday 23rd me and my partner had a lovely day out, I could feel a few niggles throughout the day but just thought it was wind. That night I was struggling to sleep and felt quite restless but wasn’t sure why, then at 1.30am my surges started. I was in denial at first and thought it was just my back playing up again, but I repeated my affiramation ‘ I welcome and embrace the birth of my baby with love and peace’. After an hour or so I started timing the surges and felt that this was it, but my waters still hadn’t broke. At this stage the surges were manageable and I used the breathing techniques I had learnt on Laura’s hypnobirthing course and walked around, swaying my hips. I prepared a hospital bag using Laura’s list just in case they still had no midwife cover for a home birth. At around 4.30am I decided to try and get some rest and with the help of my tens machine, paracetamol and breathing techniques I managed to get some rest. At 6am my partners alarm went off and I said ‘I don’t think you should go to work today as I’m having surges’. He was pleased as all weekend he kept asking baby to be born soon so he didn’t have to go to work!
I called the birth centre at around 10 am and they told us they still had no midwife cover for a home birth, so we decided the next best thing was to go to the midlife led birth centre at Princess Royal Hospital. I advised I wanted a room with a birth pool and they were so helpful and supportive. They advised me to wait until I was having 3 surges, lasting 45 seconds in 10 minutes. Throughout the day we relaxed watching telly and had a shower and washed my hair, my partner went to get some snacks and fill up the petrol and fit the car seat. I was still managing the surges with my tens machine and breathing techniques and walking and swaying my hips and felt very safe and in control. At around 6pm I was getting the surges 3-45-10 so called the midwife’s, they advised I could go to the Oasis Birth Centre and they would examine me. I was worried as it’s a 40 minute car journey, if we arrived and I wasn’t 4cm dilated they would send us home again, and as the surges were still very manageable I thought I couldn’t be 4cm. We decided the wait for the traffic to ease and made our way at 7pm.
The car journey was fine and I listened to the relaxation and guided meditations and had my essential oils and tens machine which made the journey so much better.
Once we arrived the midwife’s were so lovely and examined me, I was 4cm so we stayed and they set up the birth room with pool. It was so nice getting into the pool but the surges were starting to ramp up and I really had to go into myself to breath through the surges. At my next check I was 5cm dilated and the midwife said if at my next check I was still the same they could break my waters. I was worried about having this as it may make my surges more intense but we decided to come to that bridge at my next check. I tried the gas and air but it made me sick and I couldn’t feel it doing much anyway so I remained in the pool. I then got out and walked around swaying my hips. At this point I asked for the pethadine injection. Although it really helped and I had a sleep for a couple of hours, it also really slowed my surges down, so in hindsight I wished I hadn’t had it, as at my next check at 4am I was still 5cm dilated and I was exhausted. I also feel like the pethadine injection made me panic and loose the flow I was in and I asked for a c-section. Not because of the intensity of the surges but I was exhausted and didn’t think I had the energy to go on, let alone have enough energy for the pushing stage. The midwife’s were very understanding but said this wasn’t an option at the moment, and I’m glad they did. I considered an epidural too but after speaking to my partner and him knowing I didn’t want this we decided to go for the midwife’s breaking my waters. After this things quickly ramped up, I got back in the pool but had the urge to walk around the room swaying instead. The surges were getting quite intense, the pethadine had worn off and the gas and air wasn’t doing anything but the breathing techniques were getting me through. At this point things were a bit of a blur but they checked me again and advised I had meconium in my womb so needed to be transferred to the delivery suite. All I remember is being in an upright position, leaning over the hospital chair whilst being transferred but I still felt safe.
I could feel her moving down and my body just took over, I was exhausted and kept saying I couldn’t do it, but the midwives were so lovely and supportive and guided me on what to do. The pushing stage wasn’t as intense as the surges but I could feel lots of pressure. The midwife’s guided me in when to push and after I gave birth they said I had such good control of my pushes which I can only put down to the hypnobirthing breathing techniques. I also didn’t have any tears which I put down to the pelvic floor exercises and perineal massage. Our beautiful girl was born at 10.26am on 25th June, 19 hours after I first started getting surges. After watching many many positive birth story’s throughout my pregnancy and seeing the rush of oxytocin when the baby arrived I was expecting to feel a rush of emotion, and although I was relived and happy she was here, I also remember feeling like it was all very surreal that I had just given birth and she was here. We had skin to skin contact and delayed cord clamping and the lovely midwife’s showed me how to start breast feeding. It was such a lovely time and I remember how much love and laughter there was in the room with us and the midwives.
We then went back to the birth centre to recover and went home at 11pm that evening as we were very keen to get home. Although our birth didn’t go as expected, it never does, I am so happy and feel positive with the way it went and I feel if I didn’t do the hypnobirthing course I would feel very differently about it. My partner was amazing and my advocate, the midwives were amazing and Laura at Rise & Glow Births was amazing. We are throughly enjoying life with our newborn and falling in love and learning about each other everyday.
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